Poker Jokes to Share at the Table

poker jokes

Poker Jokes

Sitting at the table or playing online can be a little monotonous after a while can’t it? You can lighten things up with a laugh though. Telling poker jokes is also more likely to get your opponents to loosen up, feel more at ease and potentially concentrate less too? This article is a light-hearted piece focusing on some poker jokes you can share with friends and foes at the casino or in the online chat.

Why do poker player’s not get written tattoos?
Because the other players could read them like a book.

Why should you never play poker with an alligator?
You will lose every hand.

What’s the difference between poker players and politicians?
Politicians tell the truth.

What did the dealer say to the cards?
I can’t deal with you anymore.

Where do you find vampires in poker?
At the high stake’s tables.

Parties are like when you’re on a rush at the poker table. You start with a pair and end up with a full house.

Paper, Rock and Scissors were playing poker together. They are in the middle of a hand when the scissors bets $50, the rock goes allin and the paper snapped in half and died. Scissors asked the rock “what happened to paper?” The rock answers “I think he folded”.

My brother is new to poker and was getting lucky on everyone. The other players called him a donkey and he answered “At least I don’t ten two play the Doyle Brunson”.

How do you know poker player’s care about music?
They hate bad beats.

Why do professional poker player’s stay away from mountains?
They do their best to avoid going on tilt.

Why do unlucky poker player’s make bad sportsmen?
They run bad for a long time.

Final Thoughts

Poker jokes are a great way to have fun and liven things up a little. I know some of the jokes in this article aren’t the best! Feel free to contact us with some of your poker jokes and perhaps we will feature them in a future article.

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Narciso Baldo is the Director and Head Coach of Texas Hold'em Questions. He has been playing poker for over 16 years. After spending many years as a professional, he now runs UK poker training site Texas Hold'em Questions. Narciso regularly writes poker articles sharing tips, strategy, news and experience with gambling enthusiasts. Narciso also writes for reputable gambling portal Casino City Times, (bio here). Contact: